Damn those dating websites!
by CasperSunderland
Summary: Smithers X Burns story


(this is a yaoi story- Smithers X Mr Burns- read if you like yaoi and don't if you don't, it couldn't be more simple! XD)

Damn those dating websites!

I was daydreaming about my best friend, who was also my boss when suddenly "Smithers! Stop dillydallying and bring me my breakfast!" I broke from my daydream to see Mr Burns yelling at (he's the one I was daydreaming about) "r-right away sir, sorry I kept you waiting" I then rushed off to get his breakfast for him. I almost tripped over the bump in the carpet on the way in and sent everything flying, but I managed to retain my composure and get across the room without tripping- seeing as that is not the best way to get into his un-forgiving heart- "you're so clumsy sometimes Smithers..." he muttered. I bowed my head in apology "sorry sir...It won't happen again..." I replied and then came a rather awkward silence which Mr Burns ended up breaking by saying " Smithers, I have to ask you something.." hearing that I glanced up expectantly, maybe he was going to ask to be in a relationship with me! "Yes sir?" I asked hopefully "well you see, I was never in a relationship and I was wondering whether I should be and what your opinion is on that matter" he then glanced up at me from where he was sitting to see my reaction, I could feel the blush creeping it's way to my face, but i pushed it down and regained my composure "well sir, I think it might be a good idea, how are you planning to go about it? I can get you onto a dating website, so you can find your perfect match there if you want me to?" I then glanced to the side- trying to hide my disappointment "splendid idea! We'll start right away we'll- Smithers? Are you alright?" it was after he'd said that, that I realised my eyes were slightly watery so I sniffed, wiped my eyes, regained my composure yet again and said "of course sir, you wanting to be in a relationship is just reminding me of my ex-girlfriend is all..." Mr Burns gave a suspicious look, but then he dismissed it and said "very well then, show me to a computer so we can get started immediately, I'm not getting any younger Smithers!" how could I have lied like that to him?! Oh well better give him what he wants, even though it's not what I want...

Then came the problem, the only computer in the mansion was mine and the problem was that, my desktop picture was a naked Mr Burns saying 'hello Smithers, you really know how to turn me on' I had to stall my boss so I could change the background! "But how?! Think Smithers think!" A few seconds past and I had an idea. Mr Burns' mother was due to call soon, in 5 minutes to be exact and the timing couldn't be better, I'll answer the phone- pass the phone to him- change the picture-then save him from the excess nagging, it was fool proof! Aaand 3, 2, 1 *ring, ring, ring* "Smithers! The phone is ringing!" Mr Burns yelled from his office "just getting it sir!" I yelled back trying to hide the joy from my voice, even though I had a huge smirk on my face I picked the phone up "hello, yes Mr Burns is in, I'll just transfer your call to him" I then transfer the call and creep away " I'm gonna get a right thrashing for this later.." I thought.

Back in my room I managed to change the background, I changed it to the original default one which consisted of a blank medium blue screen –at least now I wouldn't feel awkward and embarrassed when he came in the room- just then he burst into the room holding the phone as far away from his ear as possible "Smithers, make her stop! She's giving me a headache!" he then thrust the phone into my hands and waited until I had ended the call, which took a further five minutes to accomplish seeing as Mr Burns' mother never spoke to him anymore. He sighs in relief that she's gone and says "now, let's get back to business" saying this he sits in the computer chair and stares at the glowing screen "yes sir" I reply while I loom over him trying to reach the mouse and keyboard, Mr Burns obviously realises my struggle and says "would you rather you sat in the chair Smithers?" "it would be easier that way sir" I reply, he then rises and stands to my side, as soon as I've sat down he looms over me watching the screen again, I gulp and resist the urge to turn and pull him into a kiss, but I hold my feelings back, shake my head to clear the thoughts from my mind and click the 'Internet Explorer 'icon.

As soon as I'm on the internet, I type 'dating website' into google and at least a dozen website links appear on the screen, I decide to click on the first one and turn round to ask Mr Burns what to type in, but instead of asking him I end up kissing him! A look of shock crosses both of our faces and we both pull away, me blushing more than he is "sir, I'm so sorry! You really shouldn't stand that close to me, you could hurt yourself" "don't blame it on me Smithers, it was your fault that happened!" he replies angrily "yes sir...Sorry sir..." I mutter. I was torn between joy and guilt – the joy was because even though I held my feelings under control I still got what I wanted even if it was an accident, but the guilt because I yelled at him and said it was his fault, when I should have been more careful. Mr Burns then acknowledges my apology and gestures to the screen, so I turn and get back to work "what age should I type in sir?" I ask "try 100" he replies, I nod and type it in "big bust or small bust?" (I didn't even blush at that question, my heart belongs to Mr Burns and I don't have the time to be blushing at those sorts of things) "medium" he replies, so I type that in and say "where do you want her to come from?" he thinks about it and says "hmm...try Canada" "yes sir" then I type in everything that Mr Burns likes and dislikes and click 'Find' while secretly crossing my fingers and hoping for no result. But to my disappointment there are two results.

Mr Burns then looks over my shoulder and says "click on the first one Smithers" so I do as he says and click on it, up comes a picture of an elderly lady with her grey hair twisted into a bun, I don't find her that attractive to be honest, but then I am only forty five and she's 100 so there's quite a difference "let's send her an email Smithers, or whatever you call those computer letters" Mr Burns says. While sighing I say "yes sir, what do you want me to put?.." he then looks at me with a hint of concern in his eyes "Smithers, are you sure there's nothing wrong? You seem very unhappy" I shake my head and say "it's nothing sir, I just had a late night" (which was partly true- no one actually realises how tiring masturbating actually is) "okay then, let's send that email!" Mr Burns seems to be quite enthusiastic about this whole process, why doesn't he press on the matter that I'm unhappy? Does he really care at all? I hope he does or else I'm wasting my efforts...

The next day as I'm sitting outside Mr Burns' office, next to the phone in case anyone calls so I can transfer the call if need be, I must have dozed off because I was awoken by a trill ringing noise, I looked at the phone for a few seconds and then I picked it up, I yawned then said "hello, I'm guessing you-" I yawned again then continued " I'm guessing you want Mr Burns?" "No I want Smithers, did you fall asleep *sigh* you just can't get the staff these days..." I realised then that it was Mr Burns on the phone "how come you didn't come and get me sir?" I asked while rubbing sleep away from my eyes "because it was easier, come into my office I want to speak to you" he replied and then the phone call was disconnected. I then stood up from the chair I was sitting in, yawned again, stretched, got up and walked through the door to his office and walked up to his desk "you called?" I asked "yes I did. I have realised that ever since I mentioned 'dating' as it were, you have been rather unhappy, why is this?" he asked "well ...I know this dating thing means alot to you...and I want you to be happy but...I..You see..."(I was struggling to find the right words for what I wanted to tell him) "spit it out Smithers!" he demanded "it's just that, I love you sir!" I then sighed- 'at least I've got that over with' I thought. A long silence followed my statement and then Mr Burns spoke up "is this true Smithers?" he whispered "with all my heart and soul sir..." I admitted, the blush on my face increasing "I see...do you have proof of this? Prove your statement is true and I will believe it, but if you can't I will make my judgement that you are an attention seeker" he said with a serious look cloaking his features. My eyes lit up when he said that "sir, you have no idea how long I've waited for this moment! Bu how to begin...." I wondered "nothing physical though mind you, I'm quite fragile considering my age" he said this as if he read my mind "okay sir..." I replied, my blush deepening further "well then? I need proof Smithers" he said, I took a deep breath, seeing as I was going to reveal some of my deepest secrets I needed to prepare myself for whatever he would say about them "I masturbate every night thinking about you" I admitted "a little creepy, but please continue" he said "My desktop picture on my computer is a naked picture of you saying 'hello Smithers, you really know how to turn me on' and also when everyone thought the world was going to end I kissed you.." I then looked at my boss to see his reaction to this information "that's enough proof Smithers..." he said "sorry you had to hear that sir..." I apologized. Mr Burns sighed then said "I'd rather you told me the creepy truth than you tell me pleasant lies..." I nodded "okay sir, but what are you going to do now? Are you going to continue with the dating thing?" he shook his head and said "no Smithers, you made me realise that if I want love all I have to do is look right in front of me and there it is, come here Smithers I want to give you a hug" I walked towards him and allowed him to hug me, a small smile swept my features "I'm glad we understand each other sir"

This was by far the happiest day of my life- well so far anyway; I can't wait to see what he wants to do next!


End file.
